Italy: it all makes sense now.

Only a week left on this trip to Italy…and the sickliness continues. On yesterday’s packing list, I forgot to mention the most important item of all: a sense of humor. So, in an effort to make myself feel better, lets go on a journey of some of the funny moments on this trip so far.

10 palm trees per square foot

The ratio of palm trees to surface area is a measure of how close the location approximates Paradise. Dante didn’t even know about this sphere of Paradise!

Next is an example of modern fashion in Italy.

IMG_2385 IMG_2387 IMG_2391

I hope you enjoyed this look at the men’s department. If you’d like to get your own man purse and pink man-scarf but think that you will be the only person chic enough to wear it…     …Have no fear:

Sporting a man purse

Immediately after exiting the store, this is what I saw (as I pretended to be checking the time). Never again will a girl have to carry her guy’s wallet or glasses in her purse! We have entered a new age of gender equality! I can’t wait to see guys stack their purses together in clubs and have one stand guard. Or do you think they dance with the purses on?

Military patrols the streets

This followed at least 10 trucks just like it; complete with heavily armed lookout peaking out the top. The only logical explanation for this extravagant show of military presence is to protect the public in case of a zombie attack. In such a case, the public–hindered by their being dressed to the (femi-)nines–will be unable to defend themselves.

Drive-through cemetary

In Italy, you don’t find drive-through fast food or drive-through Starbucks…you can, however, drive-through the cemetery. This is an equal opportunity experience, for the elderly, disabled and bounding teenagers. The best explanation for this is… that Italians really are concerned about zombies.

Crocks in Italy

And finally: crocks. In one of the fashion capitals of the world, I never expected to see crocks. All hope is lost. When I took this picture, I didn’t understand why oh why Italians would allow these creations in their stores–I’m pretty sure it’s a crime in some countries–but now I think I finally understand: “I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing crocks.” Crocks must be like Zombie repellent!

Americans, you may think you are prepared for the Zombie-pocalyps. The Walking Dead, World War Z, video games, and Facebook Groups like Postmortem Assault Squadron (I bet you the Admin of this group is of Italian decent). But, I think Italy is probably the place to be when that brown stuff hits the fan.

Look at that! I’m already feeling better! Laughter is the best medicine afteral. Even if you’re laughing at yourself–that’s the topic you have the most material on anyway. 😉

I hope this made you at least smile. And if you really don’t think I’m funny… Ao Jandrea did it.

Disclaimers: Palm trees are awesome. Guys, you can wear anything you like so long as you let me borrow your jacket when I get cold (your pink scarf too, if I ask nicely). I ❤ our troops. And Crocks are not that bad.

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